Make Your Haters Your Motivators

by Robin Elliott on March 18, 2012

This is a close-up photo of a sculpture of Spartacus at the Louvre in Paris. You can see him holding his broken chains. Too many of us allow our haters and detractors to chain us and limit us, instead of turning them into our motivators.  How does one do that?

It all starts with understanding your haters. These are losers with nothing better to do than to hate only the things they can’t have and the people they can’t be. They’re jealous failures, and they will do what they can to drag you down to their level of mediocrity and desperation. Successful people want to help you up, while creeps want to pull you down.

Next, understand that “the tall trees catch the wind.” So if you never accomplished anything of any significance or stood up for anything, you will have few haters and many false friends. A lot of people hated Churchill and Ayn Rand and General Patton. Few people hated Joe the bus driver and Tom the ditch digger and Sally the food stamp collector.

The less you care about the opinions of other people, the happier you will be. That goes for family, too. Haters never want you to leave them behind. They hate seeing you succeed. Someone wrote, “Rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by idiots.” You wouldn’t get upset and write a letter to a dog who barked at you in the street, would you? Of course not – because the dog knows not whereof he barks. He understands nothing; he is a dog. The only ones who will take him seriously and join the barking are other dogs.

William Faulkner wrote, “The artist doesn’t have time to listen to the critics. The ones who want to be writers read the reviews, the ones who want to write don’t have the time to read reviews.” I just don’t have time for my detractors. I would rather read a good book or talk to a cat.

Be dismissive of your haters. Adriane Johnson wrote, “I need some new haters. The old ones are starting to like me. I respect all the people who hate me because my middle finger rises up and salutes them.” From an anonymous writer: “Dear haters, I couldn’t help but notice that ‘awesoM’” ends with ‘me’ and ‘Ugly’ starts with ‘u’.”

Here’s the motivation part: Want to rub your haters noses in your success? That’s the best revenge, isn’t it? Well, achieve more! Not only does that prove them wrong, it irritates the hell out of them. He steals $400,000 from you? Make a million! You can sulk around like a baby licking your wounds, or you can be a man and bounce back like the true hero that you are. They write a nasty blog about you? Get more testimonials and references, and their blog becomes increasingly irrelevant and ridiculous. I know – it happens to me. And those rats that jumped ship when I was attacked by some loser newspaper reporter and the mother of a jailbird? They will never have the privilege of riding my tailcoats again. Set goals to prove your haters’ claims nonsensical.

Try this: “I scrape the opinions of others, both good and bad, off the bottom of my shoe. The only person whose opinion matters is my own. I only adhere to my own standards.  I was born alone and I’ll die alone, so I am my best and only friend. I go through this world as I go through Disney World – I certainly don’t take those elves and fairies seriously, and I don’t get upset when a clown points at me and laughs.” Angelina Jolie said, “If you have enough people sitting around telling you you’re wonderful, then you start believing you’re fabulous, then someone tells you you stink and you believe that too.”

Finally, remember this:
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

Robin Elliott

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